Kuwait's Confession Box

Confession 63 – Stupid Mistake

In Confessions on June 12, 2010 at 12:12 PM

I’m a 21 year old Kuwaiti girl who was stupid enough to start a relationship with her friend (who’s a girl as well), for the sake of simplicity lets call her shahad. I never though of myself as a person with an orientation because I was sexually abused as a child, but I was stupid enough to think that I loved shahad enough to want this. After a long relationship I told her that I’m ready and she believed me when she shouldn’t have. we made out a couple of times but then I knew that I cant keep on doing this because sexual drama was taking over the innocent loving relationship that we used to have and that made me very scared, so one day I sent her a txt telling her that I cant do this anymore and I just pushed her away.

She got married after that, and what hurts the most is that we go to the same college and I constantly see her! I want to be around her and I believe that she does too, but this is putting me through hell! She keeps talking about her husband and her life and I curse myself because now I cant be part of that life. I cant take listening to her talking about him, I cant watch her move on, but I know that what I did was the right thing to do, I know that I couldn’t have made her happy, and I want her to be happy for really hard. I’m glad that I will be graduating soon and hopefully won’t get to hear of her again! It’s not because I hate her, on the contrary, it’s because I love her so much and cant trust myself to act civil around her! I wish u the best in life 7ayatee, and I’m so sorry for hurting you!

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  1. You’re on the right track \m/
    bare with it til u graduate.

    Btw check for signals , she might be trying to make u jealous and actually unhappy.

  2. Bear*

  3. I’m not gonna tell you what you did was a mistake or not or good or not but what you did was a real friend and love that you followed through your mind not a heart or both and how much you cared about the person that you don’t want to hurt of what will happen next. Good luck and wish you the best of life and happiness.

  4. oh my shitt …….
    well, she might be trying to make u jealous .
    anyway , get over it , maybe u two can be friends again , and go find a decent bf .

  5. That was the right move. Just focus on graduating now and attempt to ignore her. Live on with your life and try to see what is right and what is wrong before making any mistakes like you previously did.

    I’m sorry to hear that you were abused as a child. Don’t look back at the past it will do no good. Focus on the future and know the fact that you can be whoever you want to be.

  6. i’ll be ur bf : D

    the only medicine for u is to move on to a healthy relationship, she goes to college and is married? boy did she settle early :/

    pushing her away was the right thing to do, as u r basically setting yourself up 4 a broken heart; do read thru the ppl’s responses to the 14-year old “lesbian”. cut-&-paste.

  7. i second what TL said, bout being ur bf 🙂

    ur brave and wise and made the right move which reflects how selfless u are (very rare and good thing)
    @ freak… “and go find a decent bf” ?
    why didnt u say hope for a good husband? just a question so plz dont get anal

  8. fine DR.
    dear confessor , i hope u get a nice funny husband and have a happy life away from the drama .

  9. Well thank u all for ur comments:)
    As for the boys trust me u don’t want anything to do with me! I’m not a nice person, I need lots and lots of therapy, I’m sexually confused, and guess what I’m fat too!! Who still wants a piece of me!:p
    As for the advices, thanks for offering but I didn’t ask for any! That’s why I didn’t end my confession with a sorry rather than help. I know what to do I just wanted to get it out of my chest to try and move on, but unfortunately nothing changed in me!!
    They say time heals everything, so I’ll wait for as long as it takes:)
    “the law” she just got married at the age of 21, what happened between us wasn’t a high school fling it happened when we were at college!
    Thanks again for all the support:)

  10. lol@ freak…
    sorry i come off as a mother-in-law

  11. god bless ya S,
    and im still game on the offer 😉 i’ll even be the rebound guy!

    time will heal, bas its like sayin ermi hamich 3 rabich, u need to do ur part 2. wats the point of passin time if all u do is beat urself up over her?

    go out, live life, enjoy.

    TL over & out!

  12. @The Law @ dr.zhivago You guys are soo desperate..

  13. Looooool I might take u on that offer TL:p

    I don’t beat myself over it… Well not all the time! I will be ok cuz I’m a survivor, no one ever had to worry about me cuz I know how to take care of myself. I might’ve learned it the hard way, but it’s a great trait to have:)
    Thank u all for ur concern and thanks even more for the kind words:**

  14. It a song.. Wth?

    • @SOTB
      suuure it is, you kinky, drunk, naughty person you ; )

      oh LOL, ur anagram spells out an insult : P

  15. Well, what you did was the right thing to do, its so brave of you to do that for her, and i think thats what real love is, its when you sacrifice something you love and want for the sake of someone that you really care about, and what you did really shows that you do care.

  16. Wow thats a pretty cool story. Lesbians FTW!!

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